silence

miserable manic mania emotion
i talk to air as she sits by the phone
i talk too much, breaking my own heart
coffee in hand,  drinking too much
got to get back on land
away from the shuttle
back on solid ground, pay the man
she listens as i talk gibberish around the table
that look, you know the one, of silence demanded
but i speak
in tongues
into a telephone
wondering what else is there besides my manic belongings
crippling me to find her again
text don't work
phone's dead
she wouldn't pick it up if i called anyways
i'm back to nothingness
the realm in space, it moves around us, guide your face
i scratch my ear to meld the moment
it doesn't work, for i am only a rambling bum
the art will speak for itself
i won't be saying anything, i promise
wait, i'll say something, i have to
"this is my work. i hope you like it"
then laughed at and booed
spinning around my executive chair
riding corn flakes into milk
let it get soggy while i read the news
crazy, yes, i am, and i'm sorry
but new and fresh i can be
with the words that speak through my fingertips
with keaton and keroauc and the biograph girl
i'm learning again, which makes me understand
what it means to be alive and well
alive and comfortable, relied on by none
trembling hands and a crisp glass of water
this is what i have done, what i know i shouldn't follow
i followed the rabbit into the rabbit hole
now nothing, as i stood mute for so long
there she goes, phones dead, text don't work
i'm suffering in my room, tears of blood,
crying like sheep. opiate for the masses
do i understand that? just let me be for now
silence kills me, but at least i won't die a sinner