edit to Idiot Savant

The sun going down on Cape Town was etched in my conscious memory as one of the most beautiful, intrinsic events that I would ever experience. And when I was off duty, I would go to immerse myself in the Johannesburg nightlife, entertained by the beauty of the dark skinned women and the lighter skinned locals. I was still shy at this point and I needed to find a woman because maybe it would take my sorrows away from where I was and why I was there. Why was I there anyways? I just followed orders and took my chances. This could have been anywhere else but I was here.

     

I met her at 19. She was a brown skinned woman and she was 19 as well. I didn't really want to have sex at this point. My mind was on my job and it would take a special woman to get me whatever "out" meant. We would make out in the vegetable garden for hours and look into the sky. I was happy. Is this what love feels like? Nothing like the school nurse or Edna or any other of the women I would meet.

     

I fell in love in a vegetable garden, June 7.

    

She didn't speak English and there were no words to say, just eye contact and smiles. She'd grab my hand when it started raining that night and directed me to a sign of the cross and this was the first time I prayed with someone other than my mother. She closed her eyes and I closed mine and we disappeared into an entity and I broke out laughing uncontrollably and she smiled, with all her pearly white teeth and we were coming. I wanted her, but I had to think of why I was there in the first place, and it was to guard the High Commission of Canada.

    

We kissed, with no tongue, and I pecked at her cheeks and all we did was laugh. I couldn't speak to her and she couldn't speak to me but it was love. And I knew it would end and she disappeared into a crowd in Johannesburg and I never saw her again.

     

Love.

     

I didn't want to go to work the next day. Not able to sleep, I got out of bed at 04:00 and just prayed. I prayed for her and I prayed for me and I prayed for love. I prayed for love. Her love. My love. And the love of the one who knows. My love. And I prayed for an hour. An eternity of prayer and love. One love. My love.