masturbation

let's get down to brass tacks here

you know what you want in a mate

but still you drone on about how you can never find one

stop bitching to your friends and get out there

meet mister or miss wonderful, nothing is stopping you

oh wait

maturbation

your forgot about that didn't you?

it's cheaper than a movie and the time spent in a restaurant

mastur-fucking-bation

capital fucking

mastur-FUCKING-bation

that's why you sit at home on Fridays

just to get that sweet taste of little ole two fingers or the hole in your hand

you don't have to talk about it afterwards

it never gets awkward and the feeling is similar

but not the same. 

awwww shucks

you don't feel that release in your calve muscles

nor the sweat dripping everywhere

you can't dress up your hand in a sexual costume

or feel the release that the pumping ensues

you just let it drip

sometimes on your bed

sometimes on the floor

sometimes standing up

mastur-FUCKING-bation

you're doing it now and you don't even realize it

masturbation of the mind

jerk out a book to read

or a moment in time

but find that mate

and save the ole mighty masturbation til Wednesday

when he or she is late for dinner

and the soups getting cold

and they don't get home til 5

you bought the toy. now use it

a sacrifice to silicon

three words

mastur-FUCKING-bation

nighty nighty