what was where

My mind so boggled

I find it hard to swallow

the time has glistened above the atmosphere of 20 clicks of energy when we speed by in our land roving machine vehicle. What is this vehicle you ask? For i do not know but i do know one thing this is some genius city/highway planning. And that was 60 years ago. We talk about the pyramids like they are godly. But there has been much greater progress in developing monuments from the center. Were the craters on earth here before us? Was our water supply here for just sustaining one life source, the mammal species, or are we just harbingers to another extraterrestrial lifeforms where we are being played at like pool in a galaxy so rich and dense. It's something to think about at least without getting all 1930 philosophical about it. I could definitely T.A.. 

The door to perception is in you.

Being. It's a thing.

Express More. livin in the city, 

Hamilton...for the preferred possibility.

justification of thought

bright light shines bright even though the sky is full of British bright little stars going back to work in progress in a speedo tumbling down the ocean side where love will flourish and she'll get pregnant and she'll say i do and you wander the streets on the second day of marriage wondering if you made the right choice but you did and you know that but then you have your doubts and once you experience nausea you're fully a man now congratulations. the good the bad and the ugly theme song when the Mexican stand off occurs and nice guy Eddie gets shot when he's not supposed to that changes everything but no one asked questions what a dog you say to your dog he's bigger than a chipmunk and be like the squirrel up and down the tree so fast but this one has a hurt leg and you take him home and feed him milk and bandage the wound and now he's okay for another 10 years watching threedee teevee hovering televisions and snacks attached to the teevee it'll happen maybe who knows who knows where we'll be in 10 years another galaxy a different realm we just have to wonder wander yonder the window makes a sound that says write more sounds make sense once you have identified them with a subject or item or personify them with a certain action or thing i know it doesn't make sense but it doesn't have to this

sound ACTION = type more ACTION therefore ACTION (sound) + ACTION (object) = IDEA or JUSTIFICATION of THOUGHT.

The sound could be something very delicate like wind blowing the chimes at your door while you read. Reading is another key factor in this scenario. Sit somewhere and just read for half an hour and notice all the sounds that are in your empty house or apartment. The creaking of the floor, the sounds of the tenant below or above you. Maybe the teevee is on in the other room and certain words are louder than others. The interpretation aspect is already chosen for you since you have already placed IDEAS with ACTIONS. You have already adapted the meaning of a sound or a word in a book towards any outer sound. There's so many levels you can go in this type of mind frame, it doesn't have to be a single word but an actual researched thought that is being seen as a signifier.

horseshoe

Why do these stories end up in a casino? You may wonder. Well, Gambling is the oldest past time in the world, From Macau to Bangkok and Brazil to the USA. The joy of betting, raising and the feel of the felt and the cards is addictive. Dostoevsky wrote a short story on it once, mostly about roulette in Russia. I don’t gamble anymore, just smoke my cigarettes and drink my Americano. And that’s where Wilbur comes to fruition. She is my bankroll. The more I watch television the more the flow gets in my mind. How television works, how the mind works, there's action and then there’s downtime. Speed plus information. It’s how the human mind encounters day to day reality.  Hell, I’m only at 6000 words. Let’s get back to the narrative.

Why am I here again?

I saved your life remember. So technically you work for me now. I almost choked on my croissant. Now why would I have to ensure you my servitude, technically I don’t owe you anything, you saved my life that you have already stolen from me. Why should I even trust you? I don’t even know your M.O.

But I need you, don’t you understand. Each of us are crucial for the greater plan. The electric shuffle. The Iconic Prince.  Two perceptive of mind. How could I be so compulsive. Dragged into some spy authority. There is no way out of here except accidents. That’s what they call them here. “Accidents” and it happens more than you think. Ladrios didn’t have a chance, Wilbur was sure of it and she wanted to prove her “no bullshit” empire by eliminating him. Show to the rest of us that we have balls enough to look death in the face and laugh. I saw a picture once of a man laughing. I thought the wrinkles of his face made art no matter what. That face was Jackson Pollock’s and I’ll never forget it. 

tell tale heart

i live to be a loner
the rap song spoke in my mind
tranquility of reason
method over mind

breaking through thou mold
in a speak easy with Lois Lane
she wants to have kids
but she's not my girl, you see

i open my ears and i hear the choice
the verbs in my head, the broccoli in my tummy
forever Jung spoke of this
Freud did actually, but i'm past Freud now

i read 5 books at once, just a couple pages each time
then the next one and so on
that's the secret, well, my secret
i know you need this, Hamilton could be the epicenter of knowledge

epistemology we can do it
except shipping our resources to Toronto
make them want hamilton
with 5 hotels and condos

it's all coming together
something big is near
something happening downtown
i see film locations

the studio being built
or maybe i'm just crazy
or maybe, just maybe, i'm the perfect fit

less than zero

duel swordsmen fight beyond battalion ways of evermore more than less than zero write a book about prison tears shudder punches landed where do you fight in the bedroom by the dresser did you forget about love or what it means to you about ways of mercury in your thermostat i can't believe it makes you crazy or does it with Jekyll and Hyde and the three stories by Poe and over 31 by Shakespeare in rags in rage debonair clothing for Bonaparte the king its maidens and jury and launch pants to commercial trips to the moon, NASA warned you. but money trumps safety and no way whatsoever do we live by the executive order of a high rise fancy over towering place to kick pebbles off of it into the vast darkness but the momentum will please the velocity of energy which will fuel the Tesla the momentum i'll say it again you have to be ready when the time is drawn and you're looking at two aces and one of them is on fire and you wake up and it's all a dream a Lynch dream looking for blue velvet Pabst blue ribbon drink up your Heineken sissy boy Twin Peaks is better they made a new version no one knew about on a channel we all watched X files even better the Truth is where, out there. my nails are too long, not the ones on the wood but the ones on my hand how cheap are the suits? cheap suits. childhood in front of a television and super punch out and Mario brothers looking for the princess he will never find maybe she's in the next castle blahhh telephone numbers etched on the desk are getting clutter and i'm losing track la vida loco more blahs to even out other blahs wondering why there's so much three b's out the bs or b's report card gets you a comic book except it's the one no one heard of like some coyote uncle dance table reporting for class if she can wake up early enough in the morning the mind boggles me and i have watched the news lately i better get on that if my accuracy is correct i sleep in openings and you saved me enough to get a cheeseburger, i was out of control and you saved me one cheeseburger was all enough and you let me have it one day kid you'll understand my brother's keeper for the brother i never had he plays tennis i heard mighty good at it too two times two is four and the pie is getting cold on the window sill your belly is getting big i know and i'm working on it c'est la vie french kisses in the morning and it wakes me up for the day my baby loves me my other baby loves me i have one and love two many the connection is open just find the jumper cables and we'll batmobile outta here vroom vroom

short stream

frankly my dear i don't give a damn except when your watch is stuck on the roulette wheel that you never play but felt lucky on 33 and it was 32 instead and now you are your back falls back into the seat ordering margaritas by the bucket full no drinking aloud alpha beta mind fuck matrimony after high school then baby factory after that wahhhh wahhh i'll have one one day and i hope he's something i wasn't a contender instead of a bum which is pretty much what i am it's too cold to be outside in this weather and i noticed that we all wear the same part time parka in the windiest of daybreak call me what you will but i'll stay strong let the people decide my head on the chopping block the masked face executioner looking down at me as he sharpens his blades this will only take a minute a man's life in a minute what can be said only analysis will prove and the executioner is about to swing but wait a second, Jesse James and his 6 shot appear in the wrong time period and shoot the man down he unravels my bonds and we're sliding to America on the next train flying I'm sitting beside some French girl, says she knows me well I don't believe anything anymore except one person and chump change let the decisions be equal let your sorrows dry your tears don't make the same mistake i did or you'll never be able to break out out of moisturizers and lip stick and blush and make up you're beautiful without all that you're beautiful to me this is my message to you

stream of conciousness

caterpillars ink that's bled through orifices of toast bread honey why don't you come back to bed the teevees on and you like this show no i don't your crazy patch that together why don't you go from pushing cinder blocks to company management in half a decade fuck corporations and their money grubbing behind back firing of young life for old lady monopoly stealing from her friends to make a glass of wine disappear i saw glen take my laptop i hope that molds itself into your conscience shoulders sore from sitting too much no bones nothing never ever land is the place where Disney first found the hook Dustin Hoffman jumps on stage and is shorter than Jon Voigt but nobody notices until he almost gets hit by a car midnight ride the horse cowboy Jim Tex wandering the land looking for the hobbits in the shire but they left already so the horse men hide their sorrow and go look for them another day he put the ring off as fast as he put it on then he lost it again twisted faith on evil's gate the crypt keeper cartoon and Kashir making the voice of the live action crypt keeper like twilight zone wondering times when all else is flattering except for the lacy dress you wore two nights ago still sweating stink make up smudged he bought you a mcflurry and then you went down on him in the backseat holly came from Miami eff ell eh and keh remember keh and ehhhh what and twenty buhuks and words of the past that don't make sense since you lost all your friends when you were working to make new friends that are never there for you when you need someone on the telephone horse bred amazon chimpanzee breaks free and doesn't let go of the ride they call life i need to go on this thing called existenz and continue the path of righteousness you don't start a board meeting saying you've had multiple brain injuries and concussions laugh lol what the fuck is lol anymore I've been out to lunch since i got here and i'm worried that the warrior leaps and bounds itself to a chair and the dominatrix tied me to a chair and teased me like the weeping dog i am i broke free and our emotion took a hold of our soul carrying a baby not her her friend was life begins in june and their making a movie about your work jump back and think for a second, why why would they deal with little old me who knows nothing and is okay with that there was whiskey and cigarettes to go around for the summer time grotto fun time let it go it's good to see you on the sunny side of things smiling and waving and lingering through the asphalt of quantum berries of joy and enough said in spotlights and spray paint and oil gates when love was in the air and a doctor was no where yet but you read and you learn and you fight til you earn that a heavyweight boxer threw up his gloves in 1904 back to the longest fight in the history of boxing 30 rounds up and down hold the ropes to gain composure sitting on a boulder Colorado the savages have taken me now to the store of wes craven going back in time or staying in present time just being and in the world without much thought unless you think i'm almost done my pot of coffee and i don't need anymore break up loveless love much too much love the break in the middle of the atmosphere wonders why the fridge keeps humming that thought process noise the literature made me then i made the literature and now what huh punk kid loose leaf silent wimp what's wrong with you punch me in the stomach and you'll find out abs of steel season of the witch on reel weekend is there too not the bloody band the jean luc godard film i never seen in the past ten years teach speak free lessons on philosophy find me i'll help good luck i'm almost done how do i end this work hi mom

singing Sullivan

the man made bricks lay on mud street

singing Sullivan is out with his tunes 

to my dismay, he's gone astray

but that's just like ol' singing Sullivan

simple is better, key word bet

there's a rambling man in the circuit race

swears to god his horse will win

swears to god on a opium trip

never really knowing whats up or down

mud street lies across the bayou'

for those who live the Bronx tale

a jester appears, drinking white wine smoothies

and tangy grape juice juleps

there's a cat in the window

a black and white one \

she yawns so i can see all her teeth

come here kitty kat, and she hisses at me

no fear, when we play, just livin west way

there's Rumpelstiltskin, drunk on the city bench

it belches not knowing what time it is

falls up then down, then, up again

word association gives me the flu

but it won't be my tomb

because i have the flu

in ancient gallery tombs 

she had to spin around in circles to get that one

ride along in my automobile

the black and white cat appears

i swerve and hit a pole

we're lucky to be alive

no sense, no time

there was a stop sign just a second there

and we dodged a freight train by a hair

the cat walks away

helping hand

The man committed himself to the asylum last week
he had no choice really, the schizophrenia took a hold of him too soon
he wept to his mother but there was no turning back
he made the call, it was 1975, the only place he could turn to was the doctors, he thought
he could also have to quit drinking, not that he was much of one, but even one beer would turn him astray, not like the old days on set of some television show he didn't know much about
where the crew would finish the shoot and jump to the nearest dive bar on the west coast of Santa Monica

Once committed he was asked to fill out a questionnaire, maybe he was a genius but he didn't know it yet, maybe just maybe
who would have thought, but no, no he wasn't a genius, just a regular guy, much like the rest, drinking their worries away, the worries of a family life, a virgin wife and an only son, this was his life he was drinking away
he needed help in the most direct way, medication or dead by 35
he could have slit his wrists, or poisoned himself, but he made the call
they saved his life, just from a few words and lending a helpful ear

he called me just the other day
on a day pass from the ward
he sounded happy and joyful
not a care in the world, the man is safe now
safe from himself, in the shadows to save another
but how much can one help another, when everyone needs a helping hand

meet me on the side

serpents gate, exhilarate, unknown cigarettes
remember the time we fell down the stairs
you scratched your knee and began to cry
you really did scare me

that's okay, we'll play the game
of lust and love and a flaming deck of cards
it's only one time for this bard
chain smoking vapor leaks

we're thinking fish bowl fantasm
walking down along the shore
my father said he caught one here
i don't believe him though, but it's true

Jupiter walks on movies
downward spiral is a must
the plan is surefire dresden
spliffs in the golden California dust

the cradle rocks the bough and chivalry is never dead
except when you're standing in line for a loaf a bread
in the freezing cold
the one man is almost blue waiting
I give him a piece of mine
it's too late, it makes me sad

where do we go from here
what stops us, what pushes us, what drives us'
i don't know for sure
all i know is that if you need a piece of bread
to save you from yourself
i will get you some, just meet me on the side
just meet me on the side

scooby

open monkeys sit on doorsteps wondering why the peaches haven't been harvested yet and also, why no one has picked a juicy one for a test drive
[common doorstep]
in box form, print daylight times ten, jobs are done and go back to the dressing cage, renfro and cletus oil mine hollywood
bring back molly ringwald for her misadventures via television wave length, they don't want us talking about
cheddar cheese for lunch and breakfast, singles, day in day out, must lose 15 pounds, must train my body into a machine, no words nothing, just a body and soul while my spirit is getting pummeled by some heavyweight champion of the world, holographs of Muhammed Ali and even Marciano
reveal yourself but not too much for the cameras are always watching
slick standby jet plane mayhem monster makeup ghetto green
i standby for the plane that never arrives, drinking juleps with press conference boys in the airport drudgery of a saloon themed bar.
cater to the kids and the parents will have to buy it, stop wasting time and give them a million now
that's the cost of just a little chance of immortality we have left
our essence into existence makes sure that somewhere, someplace your being is awake somewhere, wandering around in a tadpole swimming upwards downtown
genius callouses on the bottom of your foot make you step down like a wannabe horse trainer on the last bet of the Kentucky Derby
answers no one has, for questions no one asked
i thought i lost my anima but i didn't as i try to type this out
at 30, each of us mold into the body that will be most likely similar to the rest of your life
mocking catering feasting oh lord, what a pig you are, but i haven't had a meal in 3 days
curses and voodoo and the dodo bird walking off the cliff without any commotion
jambalaya soup and fresh tea for those who wait and pay the sir a dollar for a plate of food
saves lives, keeps the needy out of the cold, and into a place of caring and sympathy
the phone number is on the front of the phone but no one calling it and the kitchen's on fire and no one noticed but they finally doused it in water and everything is okay now
cackles from the restaurant drive folks to silence their rib fest extravaganza at the local fair food truck wondering if scooby doo has a scooby snack for us
hanna barbara land  and the ghoster coaster
a childhood lived
and never forgotten

mister Bojangles

my heart trembles to the ocean side
the crash of waves on inflatable, combustible engine tops
then it was easy when we had nothing to do
easy daisy dew wants paradigms personal pesos

daddy's asleep in his underwear
jamming good with evil in his lunchtime machine operated tool shed
where did it go and how does it happen?
i thought it was just a dream, another form of reality

i was carried off into the night in mother's handbag, Gucci styled
sever all ties to the friends who have forgotten
just a lone wolf, soldier, nothing more than dirt on the wall
caterpillar eavesdropping, bungalow squared

can't wait til the minus cold swoops down frosty weather
report card ingenuity and a minus 2 for snow shoes
when can i cope and open the door
when can i live in a time forever more

open your eyes and the future is there
well, so is the past and my computer makes me genuine
the hair on my chest is ripped off in bundles
on a well guided tour of the Danube

turn a mother into a father and see what happens next
the fate of the world in the back side of you hand
you know the score, just gotta place the win
da win, dwindling in the da win of da winner

Easter morning approaches epoch nine tail window open cold front
feature double science fiction, under arm cream
when will it end
and when will it all begin

the space leap

Saviour drunk off lagoon juice wondering why the wind blows the snow into his (and only his) backyard, bouncing off the corner rock garden into the piles of tornado valley chessboards hocus pocus. The one man who controls the destiny of others sits above the clouds in a thought processing supercomputer ashing of the quantum leap of Gibraltar's loony toons escapades. We're climbing the mountain and when it happens you step into space and there's no harness to catch you and you're falling into oblivion wondering why you didn't pass writers craft in high school. First place medals for bedlam and all those fancy gibberish tones of blue and green and hues of gold and amber. When will it stop when the cows come home and they dish out soup to anyone who wants to eat and isn't starving himself (or herself) for that matter. I catch the fluke mid dressing ocelot web slinging ultra productive press room deadlines made in such a time when the work is already a century finished. You leave a 20 at the door for the cab ride home and we slept in separate beds because it was just too uncomfortable to do otherwise. How I yearn for a touch on the shoulder by a mother who needs a father the most. There's no politics today, only righteous bigots tallying the votes again. At least George Dubya was honest about his mistakes, you can't blame the bastard, he had no chance from the start. I don't know what else to say except this weather is the root of all evil, controlled by the 1%, who by this time, the weather of the birds ensures they fly to their yachts in sunny East/West tax havens.

deadline

Green beret hat cap knows the nonsense of the VC north bound brigade
I travel west with the artillery but i'm nothing that great, they just let me carry the wounded
the wounded is too much to handle, i'd have to go to the trenches to dig them out
what's left of our platoon? Not much. We need back-up, the raids overhead
cornucopia and i'm back in the studio, still wearing my dressings, they fit snug even after the 10 pounds I've gained. New years revolution at its finest. it's only day three and i'm going berserk trying to fit into my clothes. Think about Trump in this sick time. This time of decadence and falsetto moans from an ancient gallery of reptiles gliding through the cemetery at dawn trying to find a new place for my dog to pick a spot to release himself. These others know me too well. They captured me so to speak through the findings of the literature which is wrote and written. Trump is an other, we see him and his bedroom eyes and his clairvoyance dictatorship, which is pretty much why he's firing everyone. He wants office for himself, not a person more or less, it's a family vacation, like water skiing or running lines through straws off of disco mirrors and grand station funk journey planned nothing succumbs of it. This just kind of happened, he'll say. He never meant to have THAT much power, he just did it out of spite on his branded porcupine, penthouse floor united states in the looking glass staring down at all the lights and movement. I'm on top of the world he says, then another sniff. If I had to choose between Trump and Clinton, at this present time, Clinton wins my heart for her role in education. I've always had a soft spot for education, free education, free college and universities. Build the perspective of leaders to save the essence of the masses. One turns into four etc etc. And the government looks to the future for our leaders. Slap Trudeau on the back and he'll sign anything. Can't blame the bastard, he saved minimum wages for all employees in the service industry. But they'll tax it off anyways, so who's really in charge? Hell, I could see Trump running two terms, it's sick I know, but there's plenty of shotgun wielding, ex cons ready to vote again.

I'm in neutral. But this car is travelling forward.

candy apples

i can't even do it
i can't write a song
my mother says the same thing
she drops the emotional bomb

now, i lay in bed to sleep off the demons
that have plagued me all year
sucking my blood, spitting the fear
the end of the road is near

continuous paths driven to seclusion
i find hope in my barren isolation
the wasteland it follows for we are all apart of it
mother knows best, leisure time soon

cigarettes and candy apples
cotton candy and peanuts
we go to the ball game
but there's nobody playing

you'd think they'd have the nerve to keep the lights on
as if they wanted it, if they wanted more from me
in the sombre night time shadow of the moonlight
tri-colour conquistador hunter sword

just give it up, i'm told but she doesn't even know how to read
she is epitome of negativity, pushing my dreams aside so she can live through me forever
leaving me behind to age, with grey hair and up and down, around and falling

i leave you on that note, not a happy one indeed but hopefully this job at the Spec is all I ever need.

Gg

beatniks and Trump

beatniks corrupted by suburban wildfire to the outskirts of the city
all the good poets are dead, or dying, as we all die as soon as we're born
cross eyed ink letter, Quasimodo, welcome home
this place is stinky, a weird funk, too much ethanol
how can the beatnik write in these conditions?
does the beatnik even exist anymore?
are questioning questions even the answer.
i look to the left of the chopping block, cutting wood into the fire that my body will once be a part of
burns and gauze and little pustules of water squeezed like lemons out of your hand
the pin guides the liquid, the future will be that it heals, hopeful, no damage
i look around and i see nothing no darkness no triumph no nothing
just clouds in the sky waiting to be pushed away by Zeus to make his sun flow onto our crowded side streets and backyard tool and pool sheds
the beatnik knows this, he yearns for it, for the paper, for the next mission of up and down paranoia if the unknown soldier army pushes forth in the realm of cataclysm wanton self righteousness
when will we show our face in the blowing snow, a wind storm of ice and roofing debris
the roof is caving in on us any minute and i'm fearful that it may fall down on me as i write this, i hear the creaking of the stone throw away from appaloosa card shark, trip wire fence, aluminium calking and some elbow grease
into the light i am shone the example of a man who, newly becoming 30, realizes a lot longer than before
i could stay up all night writing with NyQuil and acetaminophen and nothing would make sense, because your perception of me will differ every 15 minutes
how can you judge a man in 15 minutes? is he raw, handsome, hung? what does the opposite sex want in a man in this comeuppance of answering questions to judge a person
there should be caves in the grotto, whiskey in the den, and a percolator of fresh, organic coffee in every room of the house (just in case i either wander into it or i leisurely stumble upon a cup as i do my daily activities)
this is heaven. too drunk to fuck playing in the background on repeat, those savages, do they understand the meaning of freedom of speech which Trump is exercising to his fullest and is diverting his lack of competence to the daily pop culture suck you up and spit you out news bureau
harvey fucking wallbanger is on the fence for this one, someone should ask him who he voted for, strange brute, he'll probably get me on slander for this article, if there's enough snow, he'll go anywhere
but back to Trump, every twitter message you see of his has a code to Russian alliances, and the Russians who follow, know the code and will act soon, maybe that's just paranoia, but it makes too much sense not to believe it. sleeper soldiers, waking up to a specific word or situation. has the whole world gone to madness?
when a poetic asshole like myself sees this happening just at his chamber door, it must have
my football gut instinct was right and i went for the Patriots, it was a happy day
Trump should have a guy like me working for them so they don't fuck around as much and can actually understand what the people want and that goes for Canada too because Trudeau will be dealing with Herr Trump throughout his journey as Prime Minister (prep school costs a lot).

Well,
Good riddance and good night
Happy New Year,
I have a feeling it's going to be one hell of an adventure

orgasm

my words are your orgasm
i speak them as you tremble
you lust to read the next chapter
you ache and moan and your boy toy is beside you
waiting for his need to be fulfilled
your toy
that's all he ever was
you could look at him with awe but you knew his home was your bedroom
your boudoir, your sanctuary
you let him in with cheap wine and a spliff
the ativan helped too
you'd be at it for hours
breaking into each other, crashing on the waves against the rocks
she would leave in the morning and you lingered around
lazy, unjust, still sweating from the night before
you could taste her lip gloss on your mouth still
well, the lip gloss that was still on her mouth
whatever was left of it
again, my words are your orgasm
tremble, lust, ache and moan
outer space never felt so heavenly
the angels in your ears
the ringing of your libido
good night, and that was all she said before she turned you off
into the storm, into the night, into the lust
but never forgotten

Gg